While looking for crib bedding, I stumbled upon this gem.
For me, breastfeeding is the only way to go. And I’m glad it’s the current, trendy thing right now. There are lots of products available to aid women in this slightly painful but extremely loving task. This product, however, just scares the shit out of me. It looks like something I saw on a heifer when touring a dairy farm.
Once people hear that I’m pregnant, they usually ask me if I know or want to know the gender of the baby. (No, Yes. Respectively.) The second most common question is, “Have you felt the baby?” My answer is usually that I think so. Most people start feeling their babies between 16 and 21 weeks, with first time mom’s in the later part of that range. It’s hard to know what exactly a 4oz baby would feel like. Most books describe it as “butterfly flutters,” which sounds so dainty and sweet. Frankly, nothing dainty and sweet ever happens in my body. Grody and stink, yes, dainty and sweet, no.
I would describe the sensations I’ve felt as light tap, tap, taps. I think that’s the baby. Time will tell if I’m really feel my first born or if it’s just several small gas bubbles forming into one gigantic fart. Lord knows the labor and delivery process would be a lot easier.
“I’m having a weird craving.”
“What is it?”
“Grits? Holy shit, woman! You are pregnant!”